Most of us are fertile little things in our teens and 20’s. In fact, most women actively avoid unplanned pregnancies until the timing is right. In my close circle of women, we are mostly in our 30’s, established in our careers and have finally have found ‘The One’. For many of us (including you if you’re reading this) now is time to start a much-desired family.
Easy…or it is?
We have all heard stories of women who struggle with fertility, we all know people who can’t seem to get pregnant, we might even be that person. I have numerous close friends who have struggled (seemingly without any medical reason), and whilst this article doesn’t delve into their experience, it’s safe to say it can be BRUTAL.
When I started trying to conceive I was 31 years old and I was anxious that after using the pill for 5 years, I may have reduced my fertility. I was fearful that it was going to take a year for my hormones to settle down and for my menstrual cycle to return (thanks Doctor Google!)
From anxiety to guilt…
I am delighted to say that I am currently 25 weeks pregnant with my first baby after trying to conceive for just one month. Statistically speaking that is FAST, for my age I had a 16% chance of getting pregnant within 3 months. In my case, the Doctor dated the pregnancy to just 2 days after my wedding day which is when I came off the pill (although I had intentionally been taking it a bit haphazardly for the month prior as I knew we would want to start trying ASAP post wedding).
Instead of dancing on the rooftop in celebration, I found myself feeling TERRIBLE that it had happened so easily. I had all these friends who had been already trying for over 6 months, how could I tell them I was pregnant already? This stress, coupled with the fact that I somewhat breezed through the first trimester with minimal symptoms of morning sickness/food aversions caused an unhealthy amount of anxiety with manifested in a constant panic that I was going to miscarriage. I didn’t feel pregnant, I certainly didn’t look it and for the first 16 weeks I can honestly say I did not enjoy being pregnant. What I found to be most helpful in this time was talking to experienced mums who have been there, done that. It really helped to ease my stress. Finding out that some bleeding early on is perfectly normal and that the extreme tiredness that makes you want to sleep all day every day will pass helped me see light at the end of the tunnel!
Stress levels have now eased off (PHEW) and I’m definitely enjoying the second trimester. Watching my body change isn’t always easy, but feeling little kicks makes me realise just how fortunate I am to be able to create life and carry a child. I will never take this for granted as I know so many people are not as fortunate as me. That being said, there’s no denying that I’m certainly looking forward to a post birth glass of bubbles and some Sashimi!